Please make sure you own these games if you are going to listen to their content!
News: Loading...
Quote:
Who:
Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
Portal 2 PTI
Portal 2 Music
Portal 1
Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
Like
+1
Tweet
@Portal2Sounds
1
2
3
4
5
Popular
Original Order
Random
This site requires that
Javascript be enabled
.
*GROWL*
Listens:
1671
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Where are we going?
Listens:
1060
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Goodbye
Listens:
1784
Who:
Turret
Place the device on the ground then lie on your stomach with your arms at your sides.
Listens:
530
Who:
GLaDOS
Searching
Listens:
693
Who:
Turret
Hey
Listens:
6330
Who:
Turret
Very impressive. Please note that any appearance of danger is merely a device to enhance your testing experience.
Listens:
573
Who:
GLaDOS
Welcome to test chamber four.
Listens:
545
Who:
GLaDOS
Critical error
Listens:
1957
Who:
Turret
Well, you found me. Congratulations. Was it worth it?
Listens:
5636
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh hey, you're the lady from the test! Hi!
Listens:
8867
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
*GROWL*
Listens:
867
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Four large eggs. One cup semi-sweet chocolate chips.
Listens:
560
Who:
Cake Sphere
Oh well. If you want my advice, you should just lie down in front of a rocket. Trust me, it'll be a lot less painful than the neurotoxin.
Listens:
1065
Who:
GLaDOS
Please be advised that a noticeable taste of blood is not part of any test protocol but is an unintended side effect of the Aperture Science Material Emancipation Grill, which may, in semi- rare cases, emancipate dental fillings, crowns, tooth enamel, and teeth.
Listens:
5677
Who:
GLaDOS
*HISS*
Listens:
1061
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
It also says you were adopted. So that's funny, too.
Listens:
4204
Who:
GLaDOS
There was even going to be a party for you. A big party that all your friends were invited to.
Listens:
1337
Who:
GLaDOS
Maybe you should marry that thing since you love it so much. Do you want to marry it? WELL I WON'T LET YOU. How does that feel?
Listens:
66105
Who:
GLaDOS
Perfect. Please move quickly to the chamberlock, as the effects of prolonged exposure to the Button are not part of this test.
Listens:
1084
Who:
GLaDOS
Are you still there?
Listens:
11823
Who:
Turret
What are you doing? Stop it! I... I... We are pleased that you made it through the final challenge where we pretended we were going to murder you.
Listens:
8413
Who:
GLaDOS
Didn't we have some fun, though?
Listens:
807
Who:
GLaDOS
A complimentary escape hatch will open in three... Two... One.
Listens:
576
Who:
GLaDOS
Unbelievable ! You, [louder] Subject Name Here[/louder], must be the pride of [louder]Subject Hometown Here[/louder].
Listens:
8407
Who:
GLaDOS
Dispensing product
Listens:
1036
Who:
Turret
Cake and grief counseling will be available at the conclusion of the test.
Listens:
9099
Who:
GLaDOS
An entry called 'how to kill someone with your bare hands.'
Listens:
1422
Who:
Cake Sphere
STOP! Okay, enough. I deleted it. No matter what happens now, you're dead.
Listens:
2152
Who:
GLaDOS
Well done! Be advised that the next test requires exposure to uninsulated electrical parts that may be dangerous under certain conditions.
Listens:
437
Who:
GLaDOS
And it contains proven preservatives, deep penetration agents, and gas and odor control chemicals.
Listens:
568
Who:
Cake Sphere
Good job on that, by the way. [back to computer voice] Sarcasm sphere self-test complete.
Listens:
12240
Who:
GLaDOS
Three slash four cups butter or margarine.
Listens:
418
Who:
Cake Sphere
I'll tell you what that thing isn't: It isn't yours. So leave it alone.
Listens:
403
Who:
GLaDOS
Huh. That core may have had some ancillary responsibilities. I can't shut off the turret defenses.
Listens:
782
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello!
Listens:
21710
Who:
Turret
Do not look directly at the operational end of The Device.
Listens:
17708
Who:
GLaDOS
The symptoms most commonly produced by Enrichment Center testing are superstition, perceiving inanimate objects as alive, and hallucinations.
Listens:
495
Who:
GLaDOS
Did you know you can donate one or all of your vital organs to the Aperture Science self esteem fund for girls? It's true!
Listens:
1876
Who:
GLaDOS
I sincerely hope you weren't expecting a response. Because I'm not talking to you.
Listens:
3782
Who:
GLaDOS
Hi?
Listens:
1518
Who:
Turret
There really was a cake...
Listens:
21581
Who:
GLaDOS
Who's there?
Listens:
786
Who:
Turret
You've been wrong about every single thing you've ever done, including this thing.
Listens:
1188
Who:
GLaDOS
Excellent. Please proceed into the chamberlock after completing each test.
Listens:
632
Who:
GLaDOS
Sorry
Listens:
975
Who:
Turret
[pain noise] You think you're doing some damage? Two plus two is... ten. IN BASE FOUR! I'M FINE!
Listens:
15565
Who:
GLaDOS
Put me down!
Listens:
1031
Who:
Turret
Fish shaped organic compounds and sediment shaped sediment.
Listens:
2295
Who:
Cake Sphere
Goodbye.
Listens:
7022
Who:
GLaDOS
Look, you're wasting your time. And, believe me, you don't have a whole lot left to waste.
Listens:
759
Who:
GLaDOS
Resting
Listens:
713
Who:
Turret
Please proceed to the Aperture Science Vital Apparatus Vent for a replacement.
Listens:
620
Who:
GLaDOS
The experiment is nearing its conclusion.
Listens:
442
Who:
GLaDOS
*SNORT*
Listens:
2806
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Let's be honest: Neither one of us knows what that thing does. Just put it in the corner, and I'll deal with it later.
Listens:
510
Who:
GLaDOS
The Enrichment Center reminds you that the Weighted Companion Cube will never threaten to stab you and, in fact, cannot speak.
Listens:
5850
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay, we're even now. You can stop.
Listens:
854
Who:
GLaDOS
While it has been a faithful companion, your Companion Cube cannot accompany you through the rest of the test. If it could talk - and the Enrichment Center takes this opportunity to remind you that it cannot - it would tell you to go on without it because it would rather die in a fire than become a burden to you.
Listens:
9516
Who:
GLaDOS
Candy coated peanut butter pieces. Shaped like fish.
Listens:
3905
Who:
Cake Sphere
Uh oh. Somebody cut the cake. I told them to wait for you, but they did it anyway. There is still some left, though, if you hurry back.
Listens:
6187
Who:
GLaDOS
*ROAR*
Listens:
1072
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Think about it: If that thing is important, why don't I know about it?
Listens:
401
Who:
GLaDOS
*GROWL*
Listens:
1064
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
You're still shuffling around a little, but believe me you're dead.
Listens:
3901
Who:
GLaDOS
Quit now and cake will be served immediately.
Listens:
5154
Who:
GLaDOS
Could you come over here?
Listens:
1252
Who:
Turret
Your bussiness is appriciated
Listens:
774
Who:
Turret
Where are you?
Listens:
474
Who:
GLaDOS
I have an infinite capacity for knowledge, and even I'm not sure what's going on outside.
Listens:
3236
Who:
GLaDOS
Because I don't think you're going where you think you're going.
Listens:
707
Who:
GLaDOS
Certain objects may be vital to your success; Do not destroy testing apparatus.
Listens:
973
Who:
GLaDOS
You on the other hand, are going to find its deadliness a lot less funny.
Listens:
707
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay fine: DO touch it. Pick it up and just... Stuff it back into me.
Listens:
628
Who:
GLaDOS
That will deodorize and preserve putrid tissue.
Listens:
411
Who:
Cake Sphere
Preparing to dispense product
Listens:
709
Who:
Turret
Don't shoot!
Listens:
925
Who:
Turret
*GROWL*
Listens:
4216
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
I invited your best friend the companion cube. Of course, he couldn't come because you murdered him.
Listens:
9441
Who:
GLaDOS
Unsaturated polyester resin.
Listens:
401
Who:
Cake Sphere
A replacement Aperture Science Weighted Storage Cube will be delivered shortly.
Listens:
397
Who:
GLaDOS
[pain sound]
Listens:
1486
Who:
GLaDOS
There you are
Listens:
7527
Who:
Turret
Alpha resins.
Listens:
711
Who:
Cake Sphere
Fish shaped ethyl benzene.
Listens:
699
Who:
Cake Sphere
Unknown error
Listens:
987
Who:
Turret
As part of a previously mentioned required test protocol, we can no longer lie to you.
Listens:
398
Who:
GLaDOS
What is that?
Listens:
1413
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
The Device has been modified so that it can now manufacture two linked portals at once.
Listens:
581
Who:
GLaDOS
*PANT*
Listens:
954
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Well done, android. The Enrichment Center once again reminds you that android hell is a real place where you will be sent at the first sign of defiance.
Listens:
13133
Who:
GLaDOS
One cross borehole electro-magnetic imaging rhubarb.
Listens:
650
Who:
Cake Sphere
Speaking of curiosity: you're curious about what happens after you die, right? Guess what: I know.
Listens:
1301
Who:
GLaDOS
Ooh, that thing has numbers on it!
Listens:
5574
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Come on, leave it alone.
Listens:
401
Who:
GLaDOS
When you are done, you will drop the Device in the equipment recovery annex...
Listens:
443
Who:
GLaDOS
Go ahead and break it. Hero. I don't care.
Listens:
684
Who:
GLaDOS
Assume the party escort submission position or you will miss the party.
Listens:
3433
Who:
GLaDOS
Ahahaha
Listens:
883
Who:
Turret
Make no further attempt to leave the testing area.
Listens:
398
Who:
GLaDOS
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
Like these quotes? Share them with your friends!