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Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
Portal 2 PTI
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Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
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*GROWL*
Listens:
4215
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
*HISS*
Listens:
723
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
You can't hurt me.
Listens:
480
Who:
GLaDOS
*GROWL*
Listens:
1671
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
You're still shuffling around a little, but believe me you're dead.
Listens:
3900
Who:
GLaDOS
One 18.25 ounce package chocolate cake mix.
Listens:
2143
Who:
Cake Sphere
Preparing to dispense product
Listens:
709
Who:
Turret
A replacement Aperture Science Weighted Storage Cube will be delivered shortly.
Listens:
397
Who:
GLaDOS
Once again, excellent work.
Listens:
411
Who:
GLaDOS
*ROAR*
Listens:
747
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Do not submerge The Device in liquid, even partially.
Listens:
1043
Who:
GLaDOS
*PANT*
Listens:
954
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
I wouldn't bother with that thing. My guess is that touching it will just make your life even worse somehow.
Listens:
461
Who:
GLaDOS
Did you just toss the Aperture Science Thing We Don't Know What It Does into the Aperture Science Emergency Intelligence Incinerator?
Listens:
13627
Who:
GLaDOS
Do you smell something burning?
Listens:
4429
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Please note that we have added a consequence for failure. Any contact with the chamber floor will result in an 'unsatisfactory' mark on your official testing record followed by death. Good luck!
Listens:
1783
Who:
GLaDOS
Help!
Listens:
757
Who:
Turret
Sorry
Listens:
975
Who:
Turret
We won't have to try to kill each other or even talk if we don't feel like it.
Listens:
590
Who:
GLaDOS
Well, you found me. Congratulations. Was it worth it?
Listens:
5630
Who:
GLaDOS
The Enrichment Center is required to remind you that you will be baked, and then there will be cake.
Listens:
11354
Who:
GLaDOS
There was even going to be a party for you. A big party that all your friends were invited to.
Listens:
1337
Who:
GLaDOS
Deploying
Listens:
736
Who:
Turret
Audible warning devices are required on all mobile equipment. However, alarms and flashing hazard lights have been found to agitate the high energy pellet and have therefore been disabled for your safety.
Listens:
842
Who:
GLaDOS
Unless you have a plan for building some supercomputer parts in a big hurry, this place isn't going to be safe much longer.
Listens:
826
Who:
GLaDOS
This Aperture Science Material Emancipation Grid will vaporize any unauthorized equipment that passes through it - for instance, the Aperture Science Weighted Storage Cube.
Listens:
947
Who:
GLaDOS
An escape hatch will open in three... Two... One.
Listens:
401
Who:
GLaDOS
No hard fealings
Listens:
1331
Who:
Turret
Hello and, again, welcome to the Aperture Science computer-aided enrichment center.
Listens:
31110
Who:
GLaDOS
You're doing very well!
Listens:
887
Who:
GLaDOS
These intra dimensional gates have proven to be completely safe.
Listens:
421
Who:
GLaDOS
The Enrichment Center promises to always provide a safe testing environment.
Listens:
412
Who:
GLaDOS
Ahahaha
Listens:
883
Who:
Turret
What was that? Did you say something?
Listens:
518
Who:
GLaDOS
At the Enrichment Center we promise never to value your safety above your unique ideas and creativity. However, do not destroy vital testing apparatus.
Listens:
727
Who:
GLaDOS
Due to mandatory scheduled maintenance, the appropriate chamber for this testing sequence is currently unavailable.
Listens:
549
Who:
GLaDOS
What is that?
Listens:
1412
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Okay. The test is over. You win. Go back to the recovery annex. For your cake.
Listens:
3854
Who:
GLaDOS
Why...
Listens:
4189
Who:
Turret
Maybe you should marry that thing since you love it so much. Do you want to marry it? WELL I WON'T LET YOU. How does that feel?
Listens:
66092
Who:
GLaDOS
As part of a required test protocol, our previous statement suggesting that we would not monitor this chamber was an outright fabrication.
Listens:
717
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay, we're even now. You can stop.
Listens:
473
Who:
GLaDOS
'Shall not be mourned.' That's exactly what it says. Very formal. Very official.
Listens:
3954
Who:
GLaDOS
Critical error
Listens:
1956
Who:
Turret
*ROAR*
Listens:
1958
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Who's gonna make the cake when I'm gone? You?
Listens:
3915
Who:
GLaDOS
Quit now and cake will be served immediately.
Listens:
5152
Who:
GLaDOS
Once again, the Enrichment Center offers its most sincere apologies on the occasion of this unsolvable test environment.
Listens:
399
Who:
GLaDOS
You euthanized your faithful Companion Cube more quickly than any test subject on record. Congratulations.
Listens:
2048
Who:
GLaDOS
Weighted Storage Cube destroyed.
Listens:
732
Who:
GLaDOS
*GROWL*
Listens:
867
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Leave. It. alone.
Listens:
646
Who:
GLaDOS
Very very good. A complimentary victory lift has been activated in the main chamber.
Listens:
420
Who:
GLaDOS
*GROAN*
Listens:
9014
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Your bussiness is appriciated
Listens:
774
Who:
Turret
*SNORT*
Listens:
2806
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Ooh, that thing has numbers on it!
Listens:
5573
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Stop squirming and die like an adult or I'm going to delete your backup.
Listens:
4245
Who:
GLaDOS
Where are you?
Listens:
474
Who:
GLaDOS
One tablespoon all-purpose rhubarb.
Listens:
433
Who:
Cake Sphere
Most importantly, under no circumstances should you remove the device from the testing area.
Listens:
1267
Who:
GLaDOS
Cake and grief counseling will be available at the conclusion of the test.
Listens:
9098
Who:
GLaDOS
Ewww, what's wrong with your legs?
Listens:
18068
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Coming through!
Listens:
673
Who:
Turret
The difference between us is that I can feel pain.
Listens:
1289
Who:
GLaDOS
Are you still standing there?
Listens:
812
Who:
GLaDOS
You're doing quite well.
Listens:
428
Who:
GLaDOS
Huh. There isn't enough neurotoxin to kill you. So I guess you win.
Listens:
835
Who:
GLaDOS
Please do not attempt to remove testing apparatus from the testing area.
Listens:
433
Who:
GLaDOS
Searching
Listens:
912
Who:
Turret
I know you're there. I can feel you here.
Listens:
1354
Who:
GLaDOS
Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee[bzzt]
Listens:
25294
Who:
GLaDOS
Just ignore that thing and stand still.
Listens:
404
Who:
GLaDOS
Fish shaped solid waste.
Listens:
690
Who:
Cake Sphere
Where do you think you're going?
Listens:
649
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey, look at THAT thing! No, that other thing.
Listens:
4426
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Cordless electric needle injector.
Listens:
422
Who:
Cake Sphere
I could take a bath in the stuff. Put it on cereal. Rub it right into my eyes. Honestly, it's not deadly at all. To me.
Listens:
7351
Who:
GLaDOS
Here's a hint: you're gonna want to pack as much living as you can into the next couple of minutes.
Listens:
705
Who:
GLaDOS
Fish shaped dirt.
Listens:
1026
Who:
Cake Sphere
Illegal operation
Listens:
981
Who:
Turret
*GNASH*
Listens:
18584
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Go ahead and break it. Hero. I don't care.
Listens:
684
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm going to kill you and all the cake is gone.
Listens:
14071
Who:
GLaDOS
Are you still there?
Listens:
11819
Who:
Turret
Okay fine: DO touch it. Pick it up and just... Stuff it back into me.
Listens:
628
Who:
GLaDOS
The Device, however, has not.
Listens:
630
Who:
GLaDOS
Nap time
Listens:
2265
Who:
Turret
We are very, very happy for your success.
Listens:
653
Who:
GLaDOS
In the event that the weighted companion cube does speak, the Enrichment Center urges you to disregard its advice.
Listens:
1326
Who:
GLaDOS
That thing is probably some kind of raw sewage container. Go ahead and rub your face all over it.
Listens:
4338
Who:
GLaDOS
Well done, android. The Enrichment Center once again reminds you that android hell is a real place where you will be sent at the first sign of defiance.
Listens:
13119
Who:
GLaDOS
Someone is going to get badly hurt.
Listens:
419
Who:
GLaDOS
An entry called 'how to kill someone with your bare hands.'
Listens:
1422
Who:
Cake Sphere
Do you see that thing that fell out of me? What is that? It's not the surprise... I've never seen it before.
Listens:
879
Who:
GLaDOS
Come on, leave it alone.
Listens:
401
Who:
GLaDOS
Through no fault of the Enrichment Center, you have managed to trap yourself in this room.
Listens:
512
Who:
GLaDOS
The Enrichment Center apologizes for this clearly broken test chamber.
Listens:
408
Who:
GLaDOS
It was a morality core they installed after I flooded the Enrichment Center with a deadly neurotoxin to make me stop flooding the Enrichment Center with a deadly neurotoxin.
Listens:
6752
Who:
GLaDOS
When the testing is over, you will be missed.
Listens:
959
Who:
GLaDOS
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
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