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Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
Portal 2 PTI
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Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
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Go ahead and break it. Hero. I don't care.
Listens:
684
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey, look at THAT thing! No, that other thing.
Listens:
4426
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Never mind. It's a mystery I'll solve later... By myself... Because you'll be dead. with the sphere, cycle through these:
Listens:
1158
Who:
GLaDOS
Hibernating
Listens:
698
Who:
Turret
Can you hear me?
Listens:
529
Who:
GLaDOS
Searching
Listens:
912
Who:
Turret
Ahhhhhhhh!
Listens:
7854
Who:
GLaDOS
You are kidding me.
Listens:
5934
Who:
GLaDOS
Very impressive. Please note that any appearance of danger is merely a device to enhance your testing experience.
Listens:
573
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello? Friend.
Listens:
45790
Who:
Turret
Please escort your Companion Cube to the Aperture Science Emergency Intelligence Incinerator.
Listens:
683
Who:
GLaDOS
One and two third cups granulated sugar.
Listens:
414
Who:
Cake Sphere
Is anyone there?
Listens:
20091
Who:
Turret
*GROWL*
Listens:
867
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Do you think I am trying to trick you with reverse psychology? I mean, seriously now.
Listens:
970
Who:
GLaDOS
Who's there?
Listens:
782
Who:
Turret
*YIPE*
Listens:
7303
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Someday we'll remember this and laugh. and laugh. and laugh. Oh boy. Well. You may as well come on back.
Listens:
9395
Who:
GLaDOS
The Enrichment Center is required to remind you that you will be baked, and then there will be cake.
Listens:
11354
Who:
GLaDOS
'Shall not be mourned.' That's exactly what it says. Very formal. Very official.
Listens:
3954
Who:
GLaDOS
I'll tell you what that thing isn't: It isn't yours. So leave it alone.
Listens:
403
Who:
GLaDOS
STOP! Okay, enough. I deleted it. No matter what happens now, you're dead.
Listens:
2152
Who:
GLaDOS
Incinerate your Companion Cube.
Listens:
643
Who:
GLaDOS
We are very, very happy for your success.
Listens:
653
Who:
GLaDOS
Enrichment Center regulations require both hands to be empty before any cake can be served.
Listens:
1495
Who:
GLaDOS
This Weighted Companion Cube will accompany you through the test chamber. Please take care of it.
Listens:
669
Who:
GLaDOS
Well done! Be advised that the next test requires exposure to uninsulated electrical parts that may be dangerous under certain conditions.
Listens:
436
Who:
GLaDOS
You're not smart. You're not a scientist. You're not a doctor. You're not even a fulltime employee. Where did your life go so wrong?
Listens:
18007
Who:
GLaDOS
You've been wrong about every single thing you've ever done, including this thing.
Listens:
1188
Who:
GLaDOS
Fish shaped dirt.
Listens:
1026
Who:
Cake Sphere
Pull and peel licorice.
Listens:
413
Who:
Cake Sphere
I don't blame you
Listens:
1050
Who:
Turret
At the Enrichment Center we promise never to value your safety above your unique ideas and creativity. However, do not destroy vital testing apparatus.
Listens:
727
Who:
GLaDOS
Where are we going?
Listens:
910
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
*GROWL*
Listens:
4481
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Think about it: If that thing is important, why don't I know about it?
Listens:
401
Who:
GLaDOS
Slaughter electric needle injector.
Listens:
624
Who:
Cake Sphere
I don't hate you
Listens:
34503
Who:
Turret
One teaspoon grated orange rhubarb.
Listens:
417
Who:
Cake Sphere
Cordless electric needle injector.
Listens:
422
Who:
Cake Sphere
A complimentary escape hatch will open in three... Two... One.
Listens:
576
Who:
GLaDOS
Twelve medium geosynthetic membranes.
Listens:
406
Who:
Cake Sphere
Please note that we have added a consequence for failure. Any contact with the chamber floor will result in an 'unsatisfactory' mark on your official testing record followed by death. Good luck!
Listens:
1783
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh!
Listens:
782
Who:
Turret
The Enrichment Center is committed to the well being of all participants.
Listens:
427
Who:
GLaDOS
The Companion Cube cannot continue through the testing. State and Local statutory regulations prohibit it from simply remaining here, alone and companionless. You must euthanize it.
Listens:
3912
Who:
GLaDOS
Rest assured that there is absolutely no chance of a dangerous equipment malfunction prior to your victory candescence.
Listens:
445
Who:
GLaDOS
Fish shaped organic compounds and sediment shaped sediment.
Listens:
2295
Who:
Cake Sphere
What's your point, anyway? Survival? Well then, the last thing you want to do is hurt me.
Listens:
153913
Who:
GLaDOS
As part of an optional test protocol, we are pleased to present an amusing fact:
Listens:
521
Who:
GLaDOS
Two tablespoons rhubarb juice.
Listens:
401
Who:
Cake Sphere
Where are we going?
Listens:
1057
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Unsaturated polyester resin.
Listens:
401
Who:
Cake Sphere
Please do not attempt to remove testing apparatus from the testing area.
Listens:
433
Who:
GLaDOS
That has got to be the dumbest thing that-whoah. Whoah, whoah, whoah. [The voice has subtly changed. Smoother, more seductive, less computerized]
Listens:
42849
Who:
GLaDOS
Excuse me
Listens:
813
Who:
Turret
One can prepared coconut pecan frosting.
Listens:
407
Who:
Cake Sphere
Do you smell something burning?
Listens:
4429
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Hey! It's me!
Listens:
1185
Who:
Turret
That thing is probably some kind of raw sewage container. Go ahead and rub your face all over it.
Listens:
4338
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello?
Listens:
1978
Who:
GLaDOS
There you are
Listens:
1254
Who:
Turret
HA! I'm making more. That's going to take a few minutes, though. Meanwhile... oh look, it's your old pal the rocket turret.
Listens:
1042
Who:
GLaDOS
The Device has been modified so that it can now manufacture two linked portals at once.
Listens:
581
Who:
GLaDOS
Cranial caps.
Listens:
485
Who:
Cake Sphere
Two slash three cups granulated rhubarb.
Listens:
402
Who:
Cake Sphere
Congratulations! The test is now over.
Listens:
1867
Who:
GLaDOS
For your own safety and the safety of others, please refrain from touching [bzzzzzt]
Listens:
1983
Who:
GLaDOS
Your bussiness is appriciated
Listens:
774
Who:
Turret
For your own safety, do not destroy vital testing apparatus.
Listens:
1621
Who:
GLaDOS
That will deodorize and preserve putrid tissue.
Listens:
411
Who:
Cake Sphere
You shouldn't be here. This isn't safe for you.
Listens:
464
Who:
GLaDOS
Who's gonna make the cake when I'm gone? You?
Listens:
3915
Who:
GLaDOS
Place the device on the ground then lie on your stomach with your arms at your sides.
Listens:
530
Who:
GLaDOS
Very good! You are now in possession of the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device.
Listens:
1606
Who:
GLaDOS
Stop squirming and die like an adult or I'm going to delete your backup.
Listens:
4245
Who:
GLaDOS
Audible warning devices are required on all mobile equipment. However, alarms and flashing hazard lights have been found to agitate the high energy pellet and have therefore been disabled for your safety.
Listens:
842
Who:
GLaDOS
The Vital Apparatus Vent will deliver a Weighted Companion Cube in Three. Two. One.
Listens:
788
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh well. If you want my advice, you should just lie down in front of a rocket. Trust me, it'll be a lot less painful than the neurotoxin.
Listens:
1065
Who:
GLaDOS
Illegal operation
Listens:
981
Who:
Turret
*HISS*
Listens:
1061
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
You euthanized your faithful Companion Cube more quickly than any test subject on record. Congratulations.
Listens:
2048
Who:
GLaDOS
You on the other hand, are going to find its deadliness a lot less funny.
Listens:
707
Who:
GLaDOS
You chose this path. Now I have a surprise for you. Deploying surprise in Five. Four.
Listens:
2946
Who:
GLaDOS
*GROWL*
Listens:
1064
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
I could take a bath in the stuff. Put it on cereal. Rub it right into my eyes. Honestly, it's not deadly at all. To me.
Listens:
7351
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay, we're even now. You can stop.
Listens:
473
Who:
GLaDOS
There you are
Listens:
7527
Who:
Turret
Okay fine: DO touch it. Pick it up and just... Stuff it back into me.
Listens:
628
Who:
GLaDOS
Perfect. Please move quickly to the chamberlock, as the effects of prolonged exposure to the Button are not part of this test.
Listens:
1084
Who:
GLaDOS
Good. Now use the Aperture Science Unstationary Scaffold to reach the chamberlock.
Listens:
433
Who:
GLaDOS
File deleted.
Listens:
1196
Who:
GLaDOS
[pain sound]
Listens:
1486
Who:
GLaDOS
Two cups rhubarb, sliced.
Listens:
405
Who:
Cake Sphere
Cake and grief counseling will be available at the conclusion of the test.
Listens:
9098
Who:
GLaDOS
What was that? Did you say something?
Listens:
518
Who:
GLaDOS
Why...
Listens:
4189
Who:
Turret
Huh. There isn't enough neurotoxin to kill you. So I guess you win.
Listens:
835
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey hey hey!
Listens:
4526
Who:
Turret
Nine large egg yolks.
Listens:
456
Who:
Cake Sphere
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
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