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Do not submerge The Device in liquid, even partially.
Listens:
710
Who:
GLaDOS
The symptoms most commonly produced by Enrichment Center testing are superstition, perceiving inanimate objects as alive, and hallucinations.
Listens:
341
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm not angry. Just go back to the testing area.
Listens:
430
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello? Friend.
Listens:
39024
Who:
Turret
Are you still listening?
Listens:
317
Who:
GLaDOS
*GNASH*
Listens:
14642
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Oh, what's that?
Listens:
977
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Are you coming back?
Listens:
3155
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
However, it cannot accompany you for the rest of the test and, unfortunately, must be euthanized.
Listens:
275
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey!
Listens:
3158
Who:
Turret
Lawl
Listens:
1243
Who:
Turret
All right, keep doing whatever it is you think you're doing.
Listens:
1062
Who:
GLaDOS
It was a fun test and we're all impressed at how much you won. The test is over. Come back.
Listens:
482
Who:
GLaDOS
Searching
Listens:
486
Who:
Turret
Perfect. Please move quickly to the chamberlock, as the effects of prolonged exposure to the Button are not part of this test.
Listens:
828
Who:
GLaDOS
An intubation associate will be dispatched to revive you with peptic salve and adrenaline.
Listens:
565
Who:
GLaDOS
While safety is one of many Enrichment Center goals, the Aperture Science High Energy Pellet, seen to the left of the chamber, can and has caused permanent disabilities such as vaporization.
Listens:
504
Who:
GLaDOS
Because I don't think you're going where you think you're going.
Listens:
566
Who:
GLaDOS
Very good! You are now in possession of the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device.
Listens:
1167
Who:
GLaDOS
The Enrichment Center regrets to inform you that this next test is impossible.
Listens:
795
Who:
GLaDOS
When you are done, you will drop the Device in the equipment recovery annex...
Listens:
273
Who:
GLaDOS
Uh oh. Somebody cut the cake. I told them to wait for you, but they did it anyway. There is still some left, though, if you hurry back.
Listens:
4754
Who:
GLaDOS
You should have turned left before.
Listens:
335
Who:
GLaDOS
What are you doing? Stop it! I... I... We are pleased that you made it through the final challenge where we pretended we were going to murder you.
Listens:
6059
Who:
GLaDOS
I guess we both know that isn't going to happen.
Listens:
821
Who:
GLaDOS
Can you hear me?
Listens:
329
Who:
GLaDOS
Please proceed to the chamberlock. Mind the gap.
Listens:
460
Who:
GLaDOS
Why...
Listens:
3197
Who:
Turret
Very impressive. Please note that any appearance of danger is merely a device to enhance your testing experience.
Listens:
409
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh!
Listens:
540
Who:
Turret
A replacement Aperture Science Weighted Storage Cube will be delivered shortly.
Listens:
267
Who:
GLaDOS
Well, you found me. Congratulations. Was it worth it?
Listens:
4185
Who:
GLaDOS
Critical error
Listens:
1270
Who:
Turret
Hello?
Listens:
3061
Who:
GLaDOS
Huh. There isn't enough neurotoxin to kill you. So I guess you win.
Listens:
578
Who:
GLaDOS
With it, you can create your own portals.
Listens:
623
Who:
GLaDOS
As part of an optional test protocol, we are pleased to present an amusing fact:
Listens:
398
Who:
GLaDOS
One cup granulated sugar.
Listens:
268
Who:
Cake Sphere
Ewww, what's wrong with your legs?
Listens:
15103
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Is anyone there?
Listens:
17202
Who:
Turret
You are kidding me.
Listens:
4218
Who:
GLaDOS
First, however, note the incandescent particle field across the exit.
Listens:
311
Who:
GLaDOS
What's that?
Listens:
890
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Speaking of curiosity: you're curious about what happens after you die, right? Guess what: I know.
Listens:
1027
Who:
GLaDOS
All I know is I'm the only thing standing between us and them. Well, I was.
Listens:
1102
Who:
GLaDOS
Goodbye.
Listens:
5217
Who:
GLaDOS
All your other friends couldn't come either because you don't have any other friends. Because of how unlikable you are.
Listens:
4318
Who:
GLaDOS
Shutting down
Listens:
12222
Who:
Turret
You euthanized your faithful Companion Cube more quickly than any test subject on record. Congratulations.
Listens:
1563
Who:
GLaDOS
A party associate will arrive shortly to collect you for your party.
Listens:
498
Who:
GLaDOS
Unknown error
Listens:
635
Who:
Turret
*ROAR*
Listens:
521
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
We hope your brief detention in the relaxation vault has been a pleasant one.
Listens:
787
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey, look at THAT thing! No, that other thing.
Listens:
3585
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
*GROWL*
Listens:
616
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Activated
Listens:
507
Who:
Turret
Ayeyeyeyeye
Listens:
8983
Who:
Turret
You've been wrong about every single thing you've ever done, including this thing.
Listens:
896
Who:
GLaDOS
Killing you and giving you good advice aren't mutually exclusive. The rocket really is the way to go.
Listens:
18355
Who:
GLaDOS
Por favor bordón de fallar Muchos gracias de fallar gracias
Listens:
8087
Who:
GLaDOS
Fish shaped solid waste.
Listens:
480
Who:
Cake Sphere
When I said 'deadly' neurotoxin, the 'deadly' was in massive sarcasm quotes.
Listens:
5332
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, what's in here?
Listens:
7224
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Through no fault of the Enrichment Center, you have managed to trap yourself in this room.
Listens:
364
Who:
GLaDOS
Where are we going?
Listens:
652
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
One tablespoon all-purpose rhubarb.
Listens:
305
Who:
Cake Sphere
HA! I'm making more. That's going to take a few minutes, though. Meanwhile... oh look, it's your old pal the rocket turret.
Listens:
730
Who:
GLaDOS
Your business is appreciated.
Listens:
735
Who:
Toilet
One and two third cups granulated sugar.
Listens:
275
Who:
Cake Sphere
Starting now, there's going to be a lot less conversation and a lot more killing.
Listens:
1266
Who:
GLaDOS
Thank you for participating in this Aperture Science computer-aided enrichment activity.
Listens:
1352
Who:
GLaDOS
Deploying
Listens:
484
Who:
Turret
Leave. It. alone.
Listens:
466
Who:
GLaDOS
There really was a cake...
Listens:
17798
Who:
GLaDOS
I don't hate you
Listens:
29772
Who:
Turret
*GROWL*
Listens:
3290
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Rest assured that there is absolutely no chance of a dangerous equipment malfunction prior to your victory candescence.
Listens:
298
Who:
GLaDOS
Please be advised that a noticeable taste of blood is not part of any test protocol but is an unintended side effect of the Aperture Science Material Emancipation Grill, which may, in semi- rare cases, emancipate dental fillings, crowns, tooth enamel, and teeth.
Listens:
4067
Who:
GLaDOS
Illegal operation
Listens:
619
Who:
Turret
*SNORT*
Listens:
2217
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
I wouldn't bother with that thing. My guess is that touching it will just make your life even worse somehow.
Listens:
303
Who:
GLaDOS
Where do you think you're going?
Listens:
501
Who:
GLaDOS
You don't even care. Do you?
Listens:
458
Who:
GLaDOS
Goodbye
Listens:
1288
Who:
Turret
An escape hatch will open in three... Two... One.
Listens:
277
Who:
GLaDOS
*HISS*
Listens:
753
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
In the event that the weighted companion cube does speak, the Enrichment Center urges you to disregard its advice.
Listens:
1077
Who:
GLaDOS
Someday we'll remember this and laugh. and laugh. and laugh. Oh boy. Well. You may as well come on back.
Listens:
7316
Who:
GLaDOS
Okay, we're even now. You can stop.
Listens:
286
Who:
GLaDOS
Remember when the platform was sliding into the fire pit and I said 'Goodbye' and you were like 'no way' and then I was all 'I was just pretending to murder you'? That was great!
Listens:
23862
Who:
GLaDOS
It was a morality core they installed after I flooded the Enrichment Center with a deadly neurotoxin to make me stop flooding the Enrichment Center with a deadly neurotoxin.
Listens:
4944
Who:
GLaDOS
Candy coated peanut butter pieces. Shaped like fish.
Listens:
3047
Who:
Cake Sphere
The Device, however, has not.
Listens:
428
Who:
GLaDOS
That has got to be the dumbest thing that-whoah. Whoah, whoah, whoah. [The voice has subtly changed. Smoother, more seductive, less computerized]
Listens:
36537
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm not kidding now. Turn back or I will kill you.
Listens:
817
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh hey, you're the lady from the test! Hi!
Listens:
7427
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
*PANT*
Listens:
635
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
For more information, please attend an Enrichment Center Electrical Safety seminar.
Listens:
271
Who:
GLaDOS
[DEATH SCREAM]
Listens:
2538
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Someone is going to get badly hurt.
Listens:
302
Who:
GLaDOS
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
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