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Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
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Portal 1 Music
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TF2 Music
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Random
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Ohh!
Listens:
1450
Who:
GLaDOS
Starting now, there's going to be a lot less conversation and a lot more killing.
Listens:
1379
Who:
GLaDOS
My fault
Listens:
611
Who:
Turret
You should have turned left before.
Listens:
374
Who:
GLaDOS
I let you survive this long because I was curious about your behavior. Well, you've managed to destroy that part of me.
Listens:
637
Who:
GLaDOS
Leave. It. alone.
Listens:
525
Who:
GLaDOS
In dangerous testing environments, the Enrichment Center promises to always provide useful advice.
Listens:
3186
Who:
GLaDOS
Most importantly, under no circumstances should you remove the device from the testing area.
Listens:
1071
Who:
GLaDOS
Please be careful.
Listens:
334
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh! [Surprise]
Listens:
4033
Who:
GLaDOS
We hope your brief detention in the relaxation vault has been a pleasant one.
Listens:
895
Who:
GLaDOS
Cranial caps.
Listens:
392
Who:
Cake Sphere
What was that? Did you say something?
Listens:
427
Who:
GLaDOS
One tablespoon all-purpose rhubarb.
Listens:
354
Who:
Cake Sphere
Hey! It's me!
Listens:
919
Who:
Turret
*SNORT*
Listens:
2433
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
We are very, very happy for your success.
Listens:
557
Who:
GLaDOS
Killing you and giving you good advice aren't mutually exclusive. The rocket really is the way to go.
Listens:
19286
Who:
GLaDOS
Rest assured that there is absolutely no chance of a dangerous equipment malfunction prior to your victory candescence.
Listens:
326
Who:
GLaDOS
That thing is probably some kind of raw sewage container. Go ahead and rub your face all over it.
Listens:
3498
Who:
GLaDOS
All Aperture technologies remain safely operational up to 4000 degrees Kelvin.
Listens:
3204
Who:
GLaDOS
Is that a gun?
Listens:
1525
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
I have an infinite capacity for knowledge, and even I'm not sure what's going on outside.
Listens:
2748
Who:
GLaDOS
It was a morality core they installed after I flooded the Enrichment Center with a deadly neurotoxin to make me stop flooding the Enrichment Center with a deadly neurotoxin.
Listens:
5413
Who:
GLaDOS
STOP! Okay, enough. I deleted it. No matter what happens now, you're dead.
Listens:
1821
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh well. If you want my advice, you should just lie down in front of a rocket. Trust me, it'll be a lot less painful than the neurotoxin.
Listens:
871
Who:
GLaDOS
*GROWL*
Listens:
3770
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Hello again. To reiterate our previous warning, this test requires a mastery of the principles of portal momentum.
Listens:
2381
Who:
GLaDOS
Fantastic! You remained resolute and resourceful in an atmosphere of extreme pessimism.
Listens:
819
Who:
GLaDOS
An entry called 'how to kill someone with your bare hands.'
Listens:
1113
Who:
Cake Sphere
Huh. That core may have had some ancillary responsibilities. I can't shut off the turret defenses.
Listens:
564
Who:
GLaDOS
Unsaturated polyester resin.
Listens:
331
Who:
Cake Sphere
*ROAR*
Listens:
586
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
This Aperture Science Material Emancipation Grid will vaporize any unauthorized equipment that passes through it - for instance, the Aperture Science Weighted Storage Cube.
Listens:
754
Who:
GLaDOS
Goodbye.
Listens:
5745
Who:
GLaDOS
An intubation associate will be dispatched to revive you with peptic salve and adrenaline.
Listens:
629
Who:
GLaDOS
Well done, android. The Enrichment Center once again reminds you that android hell is a real place where you will be sent at the first sign of defiance.
Listens:
10567
Who:
GLaDOS
*HISS*
Listens:
862
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Alalalawl
Listens:
1388
Who:
Turret
We won't have to try to kill each other or even talk if we don't feel like it.
Listens:
479
Who:
GLaDOS
*GROWL*
Listens:
3531
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
The Enrichment Center regrets to inform you that this next test is impossible.
Listens:
882
Who:
GLaDOS
Good news: I figured out what that thing that you just burned up did.
Listens:
3609
Who:
GLaDOS
[pain sound]
Listens:
1124
Who:
GLaDOS
stand back. The portal will open in three. two. one.
Listens:
1320
Who:
GLaDOS
Quit now and cake will be served immediately.
Listens:
4056
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello?
Listens:
3528
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey!
Listens:
3514
Who:
Turret
When you are done, you will drop the Device in the equipment recovery annex...
Listens:
331
Who:
GLaDOS
You're still shuffling around a little, but believe me you're dead.
Listens:
3236
Who:
GLaDOS
For instance, the floor here will kill you - try to avoid it.
Listens:
3201
Who:
GLaDOS
Are you coming back?
Listens:
3515
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Injector needle driver.
Listens:
329
Who:
Cake Sphere
Two slash three cups granulated rhubarb.
Listens:
312
Who:
Cake Sphere
In the event that the weighted companion cube does speak, the Enrichment Center urges you to disregard its advice.
Listens:
1146
Who:
GLaDOS
Lawl
Listens:
1395
Who:
Turret
Where are you?
Listens:
379
Who:
GLaDOS
Thank you for participating in this Aperture Science computer-aided enrichment activity.
Listens:
1631
Who:
GLaDOS
*HISS*
Listens:
615
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Target aquired.
Listens:
4686
Who:
Turret
Place the device on the ground then lie on your stomach with your arms at your sides.
Listens:
404
Who:
GLaDOS
Are you still standing there?
Listens:
728
Who:
GLaDOS
Waaaaaaaaah!
Listens:
892
Who:
GLaDOS
Very impressive. Please note that any appearance of danger is merely a device to enhance your testing experience.
Listens:
445
Who:
GLaDOS
Why...
Listens:
3585
Who:
Turret
So get comfortable while I warm up the neurotoxin emitters ...
Listens:
1192
Who:
GLaDOS
Fish shaped dirt.
Listens:
849
Who:
Cake Sphere
You don't even care. Do you?
Listens:
506
Who:
GLaDOS
Through no fault of the Enrichment Center, you have managed to trap yourself in this room.
Listens:
420
Who:
GLaDOS
What is THAT?
Listens:
4148
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Malfunctioning
Listens:
560
Who:
Turret
That will deodorize and preserve putrid tissue.
Listens:
312
Who:
Cake Sphere
Who are you?
Listens:
1454
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
As part of an optional test protocol, we are pleased to present an amusing fact:
Listens:
453
Who:
GLaDOS
The talking is over.
Listens:
533
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello!
Listens:
19338
Who:
Turret
Very good! You are now in possession of the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device.
Listens:
1294
Who:
GLaDOS
Please proceed to the Aperture Science Vital Apparatus Vent for a replacement.
Listens:
493
Who:
GLaDOS
Fish shaped crackers.
Listens:
3596
Who:
Cake Sphere
Good. Now use the Aperture Science Unstationary Scaffold to reach the chamberlock.
Listens:
312
Who:
GLaDOS
Go ahead and break it. Hero. I don't care.
Listens:
565
Who:
GLaDOS
Cake and grief counseling will be available at the conclusion of the test.
Listens:
8099
Who:
GLaDOS
Nine large egg yolks.
Listens:
385
Who:
Cake Sphere
All subjects intending to handle high-energy gamma leaking portal technology must be informed that they MAY be informed of applicable regulatory compliance issues.
Listens:
499
Who:
GLaDOS
The Device is now more valuable than the organs and combined incomes of everyone in [subject hometown here].
Listens:
769
Who:
GLaDOS
Before we start, however, keep in mind that although fun and learning are the primary goals of all enrichment center activities, serious injuries may occur.
Listens:
870
Who:
GLaDOS
Fish shaped ethyl benzene.
Listens:
572
Who:
Cake Sphere
Hey hey hey!
Listens:
3920
Who:
Turret
Nice job breaking it. Hero.
Listens:
24871
Who:
GLaDOS
Rrr, I hate you.[PAIN LAUGHTER]
Listens:
58945
Who:
GLaDOS
*ROAR*
Listens:
1699
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Coming through!
Listens:
556
Who:
Turret
Think about it: If that thing is important, why don't I know about it?
Listens:
315
Who:
GLaDOS
Can you hear me?
Listens:
377
Who:
GLaDOS
When the testing is over, you will be missed.
Listens:
741
Who:
GLaDOS
*PANT*
Listens:
753
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Three slash four cup vegetable oil.
Listens:
310
Who:
Cake Sphere
Sleep mode activated
Listens:
1395
Who:
Turret
It also says you were adopted. So that's funny, too.
Listens:
3475
Who:
GLaDOS
First, however, note the incandescent particle field across the exit.
Listens:
363
Who:
GLaDOS
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
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