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Portal 2
Portal 2 DLC
Portal 2 PTI
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Portal 1 Music
Team Fortress 2
TF2 Music
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Hello?
Listens:
2613
Who:
GLaDOS
I have an infinite capacity for knowledge, and even I'm not sure what's going on outside.
Listens:
2433
Who:
GLaDOS
[DEATH SCREAM]
Listens:
2175
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
You chose this path. Now I have a surprise for you. Deploying surprise in Five. Four.
Listens:
2055
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello again. To reiterate our previous warning, this test requires a mastery of the principles of portal momentum.
Listens:
1980
Who:
GLaDOS
*SNORT*
Listens:
1974
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Fish shaped organic compounds and sediment shaped sediment.
Listens:
1844
Who:
Cake Sphere
Well done! Remember: The Aperture Science Bring Your Daughter to Work Day is the perfect time to have her tested.
Listens:
1746
Who:
GLaDOS
Nap time
Listens:
1703
Who:
Turret
You're not a good person. You know that, right?
Listens:
1536
Who:
GLaDOS
One 18.25 ounce package chocolate cake mix.
Listens:
1506
Who:
Cake Sphere
You euthanized your faithful Companion Cube more quickly than any test subject on record. Congratulations.
Listens:
1460
Who:
GLaDOS
STOP! Okay, enough. I deleted it. No matter what happens now, you're dead.
Listens:
1440
Who:
GLaDOS
Congratulations! The test is now over.
Listens:
1429
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello?
Listens:
1428
Who:
Turret
Hello?
Listens:
1328
Who:
GLaDOS
Who ARE you?
Listens:
1298
Who:
Turret
Did you know you can donate one or all of your vital organs to the Aperture Science self esteem fund for girls? It's true!
Listens:
1285
Who:
GLaDOS
Thank you for participating in this Aperture Science computer-aided enrichment activity.
Listens:
1243
Who:
GLaDOS
Please note that we have added a consequence for failure. Any contact with the chamber floor will result in an 'unsatisfactory' mark on your official testing record followed by death. Good luck!
Listens:
1194
Who:
GLaDOS
Goodbye
Listens:
1190
Who:
Turret
For your own safety and the safety of others, please refrain from touching [bzzzzzt]
Listens:
1160
Who:
GLaDOS
Critical error
Listens:
1139
Who:
Turret
Starting now, there's going to be a lot less conversation and a lot more killing.
Listens:
1127
Who:
GLaDOS
Sleep mode activated
Listens:
1101
Who:
Turret
*GROWL*
Listens:
1093
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Who are you?
Listens:
1087
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Alalalawl
Listens:
1085
Who:
Turret
Enrichment Center regulations require both hands to be empty before any cake can be served.
Listens:
1079
Who:
GLaDOS
Very good! You are now in possession of the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device.
Listens:
1055
Who:
GLaDOS
Lawl
Listens:
1046
Who:
Turret
All I know is I'm the only thing standing between us and them. Well, I was.
Listens:
1009
Who:
GLaDOS
In the event that the weighted companion cube does speak, the Enrichment Center urges you to disregard its advice.
Listens:
998
Who:
GLaDOS
Stop what you are doing and assume the party escort submission position.
Listens:
996
Who:
GLaDOS
stand back. The portal will open in three. two. one.
Listens:
974
Who:
GLaDOS
Is that a gun?
Listens:
956
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
All right, keep doing whatever it is you think you're doing.
Listens:
951
Who:
GLaDOS
There was even going to be a party for you. A big party that all your friends were invited to.
Listens:
945
Who:
GLaDOS
Speaking of curiosity: you're curious about what happens after you die, right? Guess what: I know.
Listens:
916
Who:
GLaDOS
So get comfortable while I warm up the neurotoxin emitters ...
Listens:
903
Who:
GLaDOS
Your specimen has been processed and we are now ready to begin the test proper.
Listens:
902
Who:
GLaDOS
Ohh!
Listens:
896
Who:
GLaDOS
Hi?
Listens:
890
Who:
Turret
No hard fealings
Listens:
889
Who:
Turret
Most importantly, under no circumstances should you remove the device from the testing area.
Listens:
872
Who:
GLaDOS
To ensure the safe performance of all authorized activities, do not destroy vital testing apparatus.
Listens:
868
Who:
GLaDOS
What is that?
Listens:
858
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
For your own safety, do not destroy vital testing apparatus.
Listens:
857
Who:
GLaDOS
I know you're there. I can feel you here.
Listens:
848
Who:
GLaDOS
Sorry, we're closed
Listens:
843
Who:
Turret
An entry called 'how to kill someone with your bare hands.'
Listens:
834
Who:
Cake Sphere
Could you come over here?
Listens:
833
Who:
Turret
Please put me down
Listens:
828
Who:
Turret
Oh, what's that?
Listens:
819
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
There you are
Listens:
806
Who:
Turret
That thing you burned up isn't important to me. It's the fluid catalytic cracking unit. It made shoes for orphans.
Listens:
804
Who:
GLaDOS
You've been wrong about every single thing you've ever done, including this thing.
Listens:
804
Who:
GLaDOS
Is anyone there?
Listens:
801
Who:
GLaDOS
*GROWL*
Listens:
798
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Do not touch the operational end of The Device.
Listens:
797
Who:
GLaDOS
Vital testing apparatus destroyed.
Listens:
796
Who:
GLaDOS
Gotcha!
Listens:
794
Who:
Turret
[pain sound]
Listens:
766
Who:
GLaDOS
Never mind. It's a mystery I'll solve later... By myself... Because you'll be dead. with the sphere, cycle through these:
Listens:
765
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, I'm gonna kill you.
Listens:
764
Who:
GLaDOS
The difference between us is that I can feel pain.
Listens:
750
Who:
GLaDOS
What's that?
Listens:
746
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
The Enrichment Center regrets to inform you that this next test is impossible.
Listens:
740
Who:
GLaDOS
I guess we both know that isn't going to happen.
Listens:
730
Who:
GLaDOS
Woooaaah!
Listens:
727
Who:
Turret
File deleted.
Listens:
720
Who:
GLaDOS
Perfect. Please move quickly to the chamberlock, as the effects of prolonged exposure to the Button are not part of this test.
Listens:
717
Who:
GLaDOS
Where are we going?
Listens:
715
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
I'm not kidding now. Turn back or I will kill you.
Listens:
713
Who:
GLaDOS
Place your Companion Cube in the incinerator.
Listens:
696
Who:
GLaDOS
I don't blame you
Listens:
696
Who:
Turret
Hey! It's me!
Listens:
691
Who:
Turret
We hope your brief detention in the relaxation vault has been a pleasant one.
Listens:
687
Who:
GLaDOS
Please place the Weighted Storage Cube on the Fifteen Hundred Megawatt Aperture Science Heavy Duty Super-Colliding Super Button.
Listens:
681
Who:
GLaDOS
Have I lied to you? I mean in this room. Trust me, leave that thing alone.
Listens:
681
Who:
GLaDOS
What's that noise?
Listens:
679
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Before we start, however, keep in mind that although fun and learning are the primary goals of all enrichment center activities, serious injuries may occur.
Listens:
676
Who:
GLaDOS
Fantastic! You remained resolute and resourceful in an atmosphere of extreme pessimism.
Listens:
676
Who:
GLaDOS
Your business is appreciated.
Listens:
664
Who:
Toilet
Sentry mode activated
Listens:
662
Who:
Turret
Oh well. If you want my advice, you should just lie down in front of a rocket. Trust me, it'll be a lot less painful than the neurotoxin.
Listens:
657
Who:
GLaDOS
Waaaaaaaaah!
Listens:
651
Who:
GLaDOS
HA! I'm making more. That's going to take a few minutes, though. Meanwhile... oh look, it's your old pal the rocket turret.
Listens:
635
Who:
GLaDOS
Fish shaped dirt.
Listens:
635
Who:
Cake Sphere
Dispensing product
Listens:
633
Who:
Turret
Time out for a second. That wasn't supposed to happen.
Listens:
633
Who:
GLaDOS
Three tablespoons rhubarb, on fire.
Listens:
632
Who:
Cake Sphere
Put me down!
Listens:
628
Who:
Turret
When the testing is over, you will be missed.
Listens:
626
Who:
GLaDOS
Although the euthanizing process is remarkably painful, eight out of ten Aperture Science engineers believe that the Companion Cube is most likely incapable of feeling much pain.
Listens:
624
Who:
GLaDOS
What are you doing?
Listens:
616
Who:
GLaDOS
Awwww
Listens:
614
Who:
Turret
Unfortunately, as much as I'd love to now, I can't get the neurotoxin into your head any faster.
Listens:
611
Who:
GLaDOS
Firing
Listens:
611
Who:
Turret
This Aperture Science Material Emancipation Grid will vaporize any unauthorized equipment that passes through it - for instance, the Aperture Science Weighted Storage Cube.
Listens:
609
Who:
GLaDOS
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
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