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Portal 2
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Rest assured that an independent panel of ethicists has absolved the Enrichment Center, Aperture Science employees, and all test subjects of any moral responsibility for the Companion Cube euthanizing process.
Listens:
2768
Who:
GLaDOS
Assume the party escort submission position or you will miss the party.
Listens:
2707
Who:
GLaDOS
I have an infinite capacity for knowledge, and even I'm not sure what's going on outside.
Listens:
2569
Who:
GLaDOS
[DEATH SCREAM]
Listens:
2491
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
You chose this path. Now I have a surprise for you. Deploying surprise in Five. Four.
Listens:
2216
Who:
GLaDOS
*SNORT*
Listens:
2184
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Hello again. To reiterate our previous warning, this test requires a mastery of the principles of portal momentum.
Listens:
2131
Who:
GLaDOS
Fish shaped organic compounds and sediment shaped sediment.
Listens:
1939
Who:
Cake Sphere
Nap time
Listens:
1805
Who:
Turret
You're not a good person. You know that, right?
Listens:
1694
Who:
GLaDOS
One 18.25 ounce package chocolate cake mix.
Listens:
1632
Who:
Cake Sphere
STOP! Okay, enough. I deleted it. No matter what happens now, you're dead.
Listens:
1622
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello?
Listens:
1558
Who:
Turret
*HISS*
Listens:
1553
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
You euthanized your faithful Companion Cube more quickly than any test subject on record. Congratulations.
Listens:
1549
Who:
GLaDOS
Congratulations! The test is now over.
Listens:
1544
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello?
Listens:
1504
Who:
GLaDOS
Who ARE you?
Listens:
1447
Who:
Turret
*ROAR*
Listens:
1391
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Did you know you can donate one or all of your vital organs to the Aperture Science self esteem fund for girls? It's true!
Listens:
1390
Who:
GLaDOS
Is that a gun?
Listens:
1339
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Thank you for participating in this Aperture Science computer-aided enrichment activity.
Listens:
1338
Who:
GLaDOS
For your own safety and the safety of others, please refrain from touching [bzzzzzt]
Listens:
1331
Who:
GLaDOS
Please note that we have added a consequence for failure. Any contact with the chamber floor will result in an 'unsatisfactory' mark on your official testing record followed by death. Good luck!
Listens:
1317
Who:
GLaDOS
Goodbye
Listens:
1275
Who:
Turret
Who are you?
Listens:
1272
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Critical error
Listens:
1261
Who:
Turret
Starting now, there's going to be a lot less conversation and a lot more killing.
Listens:
1251
Who:
GLaDOS
Lawl
Listens:
1219
Who:
Turret
Alalalawl
Listens:
1216
Who:
Turret
Sleep mode activated
Listens:
1203
Who:
Turret
*GROWL*
Listens:
1199
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Enrichment Center regulations require both hands to be empty before any cake can be served.
Listens:
1171
Who:
GLaDOS
Very good! You are now in possession of the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device.
Listens:
1156
Who:
GLaDOS
stand back. The portal will open in three. two. one.
Listens:
1124
Who:
GLaDOS
Ohh!
Listens:
1114
Who:
GLaDOS
All I know is I'm the only thing standing between us and them. Well, I was.
Listens:
1084
Who:
GLaDOS
Stop what you are doing and assume the party escort submission position.
Listens:
1072
Who:
GLaDOS
In the event that the weighted companion cube does speak, the Enrichment Center urges you to disregard its advice.
Listens:
1061
Who:
GLaDOS
All right, keep doing whatever it is you think you're doing.
Listens:
1056
Who:
GLaDOS
So get comfortable while I warm up the neurotoxin emitters ...
Listens:
1040
Who:
GLaDOS
There was even going to be a party for you. A big party that all your friends were invited to.
Listens:
1026
Who:
GLaDOS
Hi?
Listens:
1025
Who:
Turret
What is that?
Listens:
1012
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Speaking of curiosity: you're curious about what happens after you die, right? Guess what: I know.
Listens:
1007
Who:
GLaDOS
Your specimen has been processed and we are now ready to begin the test proper.
Listens:
995
Who:
GLaDOS
No hard fealings
Listens:
976
Who:
Turret
I know you're there. I can feel you here.
Listens:
969
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, what's that?
Listens:
959
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Most importantly, under no circumstances should you remove the device from the testing area.
Listens:
958
Who:
GLaDOS
An entry called 'how to kill someone with your bare hands.'
Listens:
951
Who:
Cake Sphere
Sorry, we're closed
Listens:
949
Who:
Turret
To ensure the safe performance of all authorized activities, do not destroy vital testing apparatus.
Listens:
940
Who:
GLaDOS
For your own safety, do not destroy vital testing apparatus.
Listens:
937
Who:
GLaDOS
Please put me down
Listens:
914
Who:
Turret
Could you come over here?
Listens:
903
Who:
Turret
Vital testing apparatus destroyed.
Listens:
894
Who:
GLaDOS
*GROWL*
Listens:
893
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Do not touch the operational end of The Device.
Listens:
891
Who:
GLaDOS
There you are
Listens:
888
Who:
Turret
Gotcha!
Listens:
887
Who:
Turret
You've been wrong about every single thing you've ever done, including this thing.
Listens:
886
Who:
GLaDOS
[pain sound]
Listens:
881
Who:
GLaDOS
That thing you burned up isn't important to me. It's the fluid catalytic cracking unit. It made shoes for orphans.
Listens:
872
Who:
GLaDOS
Is anyone there?
Listens:
870
Who:
GLaDOS
What's that?
Listens:
869
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Oh, I'm gonna kill you.
Listens:
868
Who:
GLaDOS
File deleted.
Listens:
841
Who:
GLaDOS
Never mind. It's a mystery I'll solve later... By myself... Because you'll be dead. with the sphere, cycle through these:
Listens:
837
Who:
GLaDOS
The difference between us is that I can feel pain.
Listens:
833
Who:
GLaDOS
Woooaaah!
Listens:
823
Who:
Turret
I guess we both know that isn't going to happen.
Listens:
805
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm not kidding now. Turn back or I will kill you.
Listens:
803
Who:
GLaDOS
Perfect. Please move quickly to the chamberlock, as the effects of prolonged exposure to the Button are not part of this test.
Listens:
802
Who:
GLaDOS
Where are we going?
Listens:
797
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
The Enrichment Center regrets to inform you that this next test is impossible.
Listens:
784
Who:
GLaDOS
What's that noise?
Listens:
779
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Hey! It's me!
Listens:
777
Who:
Turret
We hope your brief detention in the relaxation vault has been a pleasant one.
Listens:
773
Who:
GLaDOS
I don't blame you
Listens:
767
Who:
Turret
Before we start, however, keep in mind that although fun and learning are the primary goals of all enrichment center activities, serious injuries may occur.
Listens:
759
Who:
GLaDOS
Waaaaaaaaah!
Listens:
754
Who:
GLaDOS
Please place the Weighted Storage Cube on the Fifteen Hundred Megawatt Aperture Science Heavy Duty Super-Colliding Super Button.
Listens:
748
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh well. If you want my advice, you should just lie down in front of a rocket. Trust me, it'll be a lot less painful than the neurotoxin.
Listens:
747
Who:
GLaDOS
Sentry mode activated
Listens:
743
Who:
Turret
Place your Companion Cube in the incinerator.
Listens:
738
Who:
GLaDOS
Have I lied to you? I mean in this room. Trust me, leave that thing alone.
Listens:
733
Who:
GLaDOS
Fantastic! You remained resolute and resourceful in an atmosphere of extreme pessimism.
Listens:
730
Who:
GLaDOS
Your business is appreciated.
Listens:
729
Who:
Toilet
Fish shaped dirt.
Listens:
724
Who:
Cake Sphere
Awwww
Listens:
723
Who:
Turret
*HISS*
Listens:
722
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
HA! I'm making more. That's going to take a few minutes, though. Meanwhile... oh look, it's your old pal the rocket turret.
Listens:
710
Who:
GLaDOS
*ROAR*
Listens:
708
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Dispensing product
Listens:
708
Who:
Turret
Firing
Listens:
704
Who:
Turret
Put me down!
Listens:
695
Who:
Turret
Unfortunately, as much as I'd love to now, I can't get the neurotoxin into your head any faster.
Listens:
693
Who:
GLaDOS
Do not submerge The Device in liquid, even partially.
Listens:
691
Who:
GLaDOS
Time out for a second. That wasn't supposed to happen.
Listens:
690
Who:
GLaDOS
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
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