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Rest assured that an independent panel of ethicists has absolved the Enrichment Center, Aperture Science employees, and all test subjects of any moral responsibility for the Companion Cube euthanizing process.
Listens:
2858
Who:
GLaDOS
Assume the party escort submission position or you will miss the party.
Listens:
2781
Who:
GLaDOS
[DEATH SCREAM]
Listens:
2686
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
I have an infinite capacity for knowledge, and even I'm not sure what's going on outside.
Listens:
2662
Who:
GLaDOS
You chose this path. Now I have a surprise for you. Deploying surprise in Five. Four.
Listens:
2354
Who:
GLaDOS
*SNORT*
Listens:
2352
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Hello again. To reiterate our previous warning, this test requires a mastery of the principles of portal momentum.
Listens:
2242
Who:
GLaDOS
Fish shaped organic compounds and sediment shaped sediment.
Listens:
2016
Who:
Cake Sphere
Nap time
Listens:
1896
Who:
Turret
You're not a good person. You know that, right?
Listens:
1783
Who:
GLaDOS
*HISS*
Listens:
1770
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
STOP! Okay, enough. I deleted it. No matter what happens now, you're dead.
Listens:
1742
Who:
GLaDOS
One 18.25 ounce package chocolate cake mix.
Listens:
1741
Who:
Cake Sphere
Hello?
Listens:
1679
Who:
Turret
Congratulations! The test is now over.
Listens:
1629
Who:
GLaDOS
Hello?
Listens:
1625
Who:
GLaDOS
*ROAR*
Listens:
1621
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
You euthanized your faithful Companion Cube more quickly than any test subject on record. Congratulations.
Listens:
1619
Who:
GLaDOS
Who ARE you?
Listens:
1569
Who:
Turret
Thank you for participating in this Aperture Science computer-aided enrichment activity.
Listens:
1521
Who:
GLaDOS
Did you know you can donate one or all of your vital organs to the Aperture Science self esteem fund for girls? It's true!
Listens:
1498
Who:
GLaDOS
For your own safety and the safety of others, please refrain from touching [bzzzzzt]
Listens:
1477
Who:
GLaDOS
Is that a gun?
Listens:
1452
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Please note that we have added a consequence for failure. Any contact with the chamber floor will result in an 'unsatisfactory' mark on your official testing record followed by death. Good luck!
Listens:
1414
Who:
GLaDOS
Who are you?
Listens:
1391
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Critical error
Listens:
1381
Who:
Turret
Goodbye
Listens:
1380
Who:
Turret
*GROWL*
Listens:
1371
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Lawl
Listens:
1334
Who:
Turret
Starting now, there's going to be a lot less conversation and a lot more killing.
Listens:
1321
Who:
GLaDOS
Alalalawl
Listens:
1320
Who:
Turret
Ohh!
Listens:
1313
Who:
GLaDOS
Sleep mode activated
Listens:
1300
Who:
Turret
stand back. The portal will open in three. two. one.
Listens:
1254
Who:
GLaDOS
Very good! You are now in possession of the Aperture Science Handheld Portal Device.
Listens:
1239
Who:
GLaDOS
Enrichment Center regulations require both hands to be empty before any cake can be served.
Listens:
1229
Who:
GLaDOS
All I know is I'm the only thing standing between us and them. Well, I was.
Listens:
1156
Who:
GLaDOS
What is that?
Listens:
1151
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Hi?
Listens:
1145
Who:
Turret
So get comfortable while I warm up the neurotoxin emitters ...
Listens:
1142
Who:
GLaDOS
All right, keep doing whatever it is you think you're doing.
Listens:
1123
Who:
GLaDOS
Stop what you are doing and assume the party escort submission position.
Listens:
1123
Who:
GLaDOS
In the event that the weighted companion cube does speak, the Enrichment Center urges you to disregard its advice.
Listens:
1107
Who:
GLaDOS
*GROWL*
Listens:
1081
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
There was even going to be a party for you. A big party that all your friends were invited to.
Listens:
1080
Who:
GLaDOS
I know you're there. I can feel you here.
Listens:
1068
Who:
GLaDOS
Vital testing apparatus destroyed.
Listens:
1067
Who:
GLaDOS
No hard fealings
Listens:
1066
Who:
Turret
Your specimen has been processed and we are now ready to begin the test proper.
Listens:
1064
Who:
GLaDOS
Speaking of curiosity: you're curious about what happens after you die, right? Guess what: I know.
Listens:
1059
Who:
GLaDOS
Sorry, we're closed
Listens:
1056
Who:
Turret
Oh, what's that?
Listens:
1052
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
An entry called 'how to kill someone with your bare hands.'
Listens:
1043
Who:
Cake Sphere
For your own safety, do not destroy vital testing apparatus.
Listens:
1039
Who:
GLaDOS
Most importantly, under no circumstances should you remove the device from the testing area.
Listens:
1019
Who:
GLaDOS
[pain sound]
Listens:
1019
Who:
GLaDOS
To ensure the safe performance of all authorized activities, do not destroy vital testing apparatus.
Listens:
1003
Who:
GLaDOS
Gotcha!
Listens:
999
Who:
Turret
Please put me down
Listens:
992
Who:
Turret
Could you come over here?
Listens:
979
Who:
Turret
There you are
Listens:
964
Who:
Turret
What's that?
Listens:
959
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
Do not touch the operational end of The Device.
Listens:
950
Who:
GLaDOS
That thing you burned up isn't important to me. It's the fluid catalytic cracking unit. It made shoes for orphans.
Listens:
942
Who:
GLaDOS
You've been wrong about every single thing you've ever done, including this thing.
Listens:
930
Who:
GLaDOS
File deleted.
Listens:
927
Who:
GLaDOS
Is anyone there?
Listens:
925
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh, I'm gonna kill you.
Listens:
921
Who:
GLaDOS
Never mind. It's a mystery I'll solve later... By myself... Because you'll be dead. with the sphere, cycle through these:
Listens:
916
Who:
GLaDOS
The difference between us is that I can feel pain.
Listens:
908
Who:
GLaDOS
Woooaaah!
Listens:
906
Who:
Turret
Perfect. Please move quickly to the chamberlock, as the effects of prolonged exposure to the Button are not part of this test.
Listens:
888
Who:
GLaDOS
*HISS*
Listens:
877
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Where are we going?
Listens:
867
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
What's that noise?
Listens:
855
Who:
Curiosity Sphere
We hope your brief detention in the relaxation vault has been a pleasant one.
Listens:
852
Who:
GLaDOS
I'm not kidding now. Turn back or I will kill you.
Listens:
852
Who:
GLaDOS
Hey! It's me!
Listens:
850
Who:
Turret
I guess we both know that isn't going to happen.
Listens:
845
Who:
GLaDOS
Waaaaaaaaah!
Listens:
844
Who:
GLaDOS
Please place the Weighted Storage Cube on the Fifteen Hundred Megawatt Aperture Science Heavy Duty Super-Colliding Super Button.
Listens:
843
Who:
GLaDOS
*ROAR*
Listens:
839
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
The Enrichment Center regrets to inform you that this next test is impossible.
Listens:
836
Who:
GLaDOS
*GROWL*
Listens:
830
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
I don't blame you
Listens:
825
Who:
Turret
*HISS*
Listens:
821
Who:
Aggressive Sphere
Before we start, however, keep in mind that although fun and learning are the primary goals of all enrichment center activities, serious injuries may occur.
Listens:
821
Who:
GLaDOS
Oh well. If you want my advice, you should just lie down in front of a rocket. Trust me, it'll be a lot less painful than the neurotoxin.
Listens:
820
Who:
GLaDOS
Sentry mode activated
Listens:
819
Who:
Turret
Awwww
Listens:
818
Who:
Turret
Fish shaped dirt.
Listens:
796
Who:
Cake Sphere
Fantastic! You remained resolute and resourceful in an atmosphere of extreme pessimism.
Listens:
784
Who:
GLaDOS
Have I lied to you? I mean in this room. Trust me, leave that thing alone.
Listens:
783
Who:
GLaDOS
Your business is appreciated.
Listens:
778
Who:
Toilet
HA! I'm making more. That's going to take a few minutes, though. Meanwhile... oh look, it's your old pal the rocket turret.
Listens:
774
Who:
GLaDOS
Dispensing product
Listens:
772
Who:
Turret
Firing
Listens:
772
Who:
Turret
Put me down!
Listens:
771
Who:
Turret
Place your Companion Cube in the incinerator.
Listens:
770
Who:
GLaDOS
Good people don't end up here.
Listens:
763
Who:
GLaDOS
00:00 / 00:00
Test Player
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